period: now: reflecting

i've thought ofa few things

the quality and clarity of your writing conveys the meaning moreso than the feeling in your writing. while you can have passion in youwriting you need clarity. you need to be able to say an describe your thought and to put ti into words for tother people to really grasp it the way you do. not just seeing the words and getting the gist of it but really feeling how you feel seeing how you see and resacting the away you react. that is really difficult. but maybe if you dont give them reasons but isntead give them feelings and describe those with clarity they can understand them the cirucmstances from whic htheyve sprouted dont have to be something they really agree with because they dont have to be in the description and in that in that method then you cna realy get them to feel something that is yours and then they are really getting something form you relating to you through th ethe text you dont want people to relate to the text through you, you want them torelate to you through your text, and maybe through your song you can get them to relate to you rather than to your song. but its all interesting

anyway on teh subjusct of vivek, why did he come up? because i was sitting in here and suddenly thoght to open it up, im not sure why, i think it was a phrase i red somewhere on someone pondering the meaning of life ah tompts that was where i was looking through old fantasy and there was this tomp t description of one pondering the meaning of life and death and the word death got me thinking about ivvek and then i checked out his myspace and listend to the songs and i hear them differently many different ways have i heard those songs and get new things out of them even today i felt like iw as fprying out iveks secrets trying to understand him and i realized its the people who you look up to as heros that really make things pretty amazing without them then things dont seem as bright ufn and wonderful but vivek was my hero and it is tough when your hero dies and you are there but that happened to me and it wasnt easy this was a difficult period i wastched his body there on the display at teh funeral but i am reading that people return to their elements like we go we build up our body we build up our thougtsh we learn and grow through out life and dthen we return our elements to the world but i wodner because our personalities arent stone or water or air there is somethign there while we areputting togethersomething it does take a life of its own on in the personality and i wonder if those conitnue somewhere with this afterlife idea or something i dont know where they do end up but i do know that there are lots of things about it that are interesting and also things that i have lrge gaps in my understanding of
now that im here in aberdeen im wondering if i came to the right place its cold every day aive read some ome describe aberdeen as three hours below the ... what is it the ... polar .. zone? where its cold and it is cold we have the ocean air and the generally midl weather and also the mild abnd slightly bitter an dhistile tmerpamnt of the people whic his such a huge difference betern the icelandic point of view but at least these people show their contempt to you in america they dont and just hold themselves back immensely and you have these people who spend most of their energy and effort into holding back ; p ai guess there is more of a threat here but i mean i dont really feel threatened. iceland is still my tpoplace and its only moreso the case now that ive ben to aberdeen and seen some of the people here.